Part 31: Mini Biography, Vol.9
In this Entry, Vol.9 of the Mini Biography series, Also Known as "The First Day of the Rest of My Life," Details the final weeks, over High School days, Probation, Internal struggle with missing aspects of the past, etc... Big Plans & Big Dreams Require a lot of hard work and patience.
The Autobiography of Freeze Flame:
Vol. 8: The Rest of 99, SOME REAL CHANGE
As the summer of 1999 came to close, so did Young Red's Summer employment. Shortly after Labour Day Weekend, Red was abruptly fired from the theme park... He decided to go back to school for one more year...
With Graduation in his sights, Red tried to focus on gaining some extra credits to expand his post secondary possibities. He also decided to try out for the football team to see if he could compete again as an athlete...
He wasn't much concerned with school, since he had already technically graduated, Red just wasn't sure what he was going to do after leaving high school. He only really had one goal, one focus, but no real idea about how to go about reaching that goal. He knew it was possible and knew he could do it, but not alone... It was now recruitment season...
Red spent much of his spare time, observing and talking to fellow students about ideas, and what they were interested in, many of them had similar plans, some of them were already doing things geared towards the same goals, just not quite on the same path...
Red was eagerly awaiting the end of Probation for the first time in several years, now with only a few months remaining, Red could see freedom on the Horizon. With his probation now in his new Toronto neighborhood, Red's PO was fairly impressed with his progress and allowed long periods of time to elapse between scheduled visits. By the middle of September, Red's PO told him to keep out of trouble for the remainder of his time and come to see him in the final week of the probation order...
This freed up a lot of time for Red to focus on other things, but still keeping mainly to himself in his free time... Red began to plan out some strategies, and also look into some schools that he had heard of that catered to the music industry. He continued to study the Cds in and out, and keep up to date with the industry magazines...
By the time October rolled in, and the weather started to change, Red was experiencing difficulty with his required medication, it was affecting his concentration and making him gain weight rapidly, in turn making him self conscious and lowering his spirits...
Red held his head proudly despite his inner feeling, he was very proud of himself being only a couple weeks away from being handed his High School diploma. Something that he had worked very hard for over the last few years.
It was the final days of October 1999, When Red Brown walked the stage to received his last document in a high School setting... His gradutation diploma. It was the following days that Red began experiencing an anxiousness that would begin to consume his mind... He was thinking about leaving school...
He had already stopped playing football, his enthusiasm had ran dry from the lack of energy the medication was giving him.... He remembered and started thinking of the list of names he had come accross almost a year before... Previously, he had focused on the phone numbers... this time, Red realized that the list included addresses too.... He could have smacked himself for not thinking of it sooner.
Red's next focus was to draw up a rough draft of a letter... this took longer than he anticipated...
Red had a new plan, that would now take precedent over the Music, only because after long deep thought, and writing a few times, he figured this was something that needed to be done in order for him to gain some perspective on his own life, and up bringing... health background, etc...
The combination of the anxious thinking, gain the diploma, and lack of interest in the school as well as the need to sit and write some letters... Red's new plan required still some time, but a loss of independance in order to gain a whole lot more Freedom & Independance...
After obtaining his diploma, Red began to spend more time with his family on the weekends, dicsussing his possible return to living in their home. Red's Probation was up at the end of November, and asked his parents if they thought it would be a good idea for him to even return at all.... They did welcome him, but wanted him to remain active, either in some sort of school program or work...
Red Agreed to their terms, but had to make some unlikeable concessions... he thought he had to deal with it for at least until he got the letter completed.
In the final week of November, Red met with his probation officer for the last time, and with a "best of luck", his PO said goodbye, and told him not to come back...
Red decided to confide in one of his teachers and his guidance councilor, not giving them complete details, they advised him that leaving school wasn't the best idea... But he had bigger plans than receiving extra credits... And although, he did look into returning to school in the city his parents now lived in... the principle would not allow him to enroll as an adult... And shoved him off to an adult learning centre on the other side of town...
The Adult program was a learn at your own pace type school, something Red had done before, but not accomplished much.. the Process was much slower. Red enrolled anyway, it got him out of the house for the day... and at first worked away on some courses...
One day, tired from trying to think of what to put in this letter project, he look around the upper level of the new school for a place to take a nap out of site... And found a small cubicle to put his head down. He slept for awhile, and when he awoke, he had an idea and an urge to write.... From there the letter flowed...
Instead of choosing one person on the list, he decided to write hand written letter to each person individually... astonished at himself for not thinking of it much sooner... the letters became his reason for going to school. He had peace and quiet and plenty of time to pump out as many as possible. It maybe took a week or so to write 26 hand written personalized letters, to people in BC that may or may not have been relatives of his birth family...
He mailed them in small spirts, and awaited responses...
Only weeks prior to this, Red had been patiently waiting for his last days of probation to end for the first time since he was about 14 years old... On the eve of this day, November 29, 1999, Red & his family celebrated by taking him to Mandarin Buffet Restaurant for his first time...
This Day has come to be known as, The First Day of the Rest of his Life...
Young Red Brown, had now paid his debt to society and earned his freedom, and he knew exactly what he was going to do...
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